Now My Wings Fit

A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

Who recognises
the oxymoron that is


The Days Are Seeds Planted in the Dark

It doesn’t feel like
4 o’ clock, because it is
not dark outside yet.

Turns Out You Can Chat Some Real Shit When You’re Super Tired

Everyone knows that once a fridge door is closed, it cannot open again for fifty-nine years. I have seen a fridge door open but once. I am one of the lucky ones.

I Am Bedraggled

My draggled is in a distinctly extant position.

I Am Nearly Out of Porridge Oats

I told myself I wouldn’t let the #BeastFromtheEast get to me. There was nothing it could do to harm me, no hardship I could not overcome. How na├»ve I was in those first days. How arrogant. How proud. I may have met my match. I just might have met my match.

My Hands Are So Cold, I Can Barely Type

A long sleeved t-shirt under a regular t-shirt: my armour against the Beast From the East.

This Pleases Me Because it Rhymes

T’aint and Taint:

One is literally a negation,
the other just has negative connotations.

Party of One

Tell me, would it be thy plan
to come tonight by thine own hand?
There is no shame in going stag;
you might end up having a better shag.


That awkward moment
when your stress ball is rolling
around the table,
performing the exactly the
opposite of its function.


Stop working at three
to spend the rest of the day
writing some haikus

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